Emotion is the enemy of wise music craft

The first time I heard the saying in ciBemba that "Bakolwe basekana ifipato," I thoguht it was restricted to our arboreal cousins.


I grew up in a komboni on the Copperbelt. I did not choose that seedy neighborhood for my nursery. This is the one time when I unknowingly ceded responsibility to the hands of other people and say, "the decision was made for me." I have not regrets though. Most importantly I worked hard to change things. As I say, "Every devastating blow carries with it the seed of strength." You can see, I lived to talk about it.

Others did, too. But most of those that I grew up with have passed on. This piece, however, is not about me. Rather it is about those that are coming on my heels. Those who are suffering the same belittlement as the komboni kids always do by the kids from ku mayadi. At the time I thought they were snobs. But in retrospect, I think they did not have much of a choice either.

I am not quite sure but entertainer Dandy Krazy could be one of those coming on my heels. In Krazy's view, the Award things are not working well for him. They fall short of meeting his expectations - whatever those expectations were. And using the best means available to him, he lashes out at them all!

I was about to label Krazy's outbursts as irrational when I noticed some other dude who sounded like a kid from ku mayadi decided to reduce Krazy to a mere caricature of a performer. As you will soon notice, Krazy did not mention a name. Instead, he, in no uncertain terms, indicated that he had an axe to grind with the organizations. But the dude who sounded like a kid from ku mayadi personalized the whole issue. He went for Krazy's jugular and tore the poor Komboni young man apart. This is not an attempt to stand in solidarity with fellow Komboni survivor, but to highlight the poverty of thought in some of our young men. This lack of tolerance for one another and patience to try and understand first before acting is a blight that is likely to be carried through to public office should these young men decide to run for office.

One can argue that the fussing and fighting we are forced to witness in public figures is rubbing off to the young generation. Those aspiring to and holding public office of any magnitude ought to realize that emotion is the enemy of wise statecraft.

I have highlighted with blue what I thought were incendiary comments and inserted my comments in brown.
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Kondowe urges ZAM to discipline Dandy

By Lovely Kayombo Fri 21 Jan. 2011, 18:00

Dandy Krazy

FOLLOWING Dandy Krazy’s outbursts against the Ngoma and Born and Bred awards at a performance held at Breakpoint in Lusaka recently, the Zambia One Comedy outfit have expressed their disappointment with the singer’s behaviour and charged that he is ignorant over how much the organisers put in to come up with the awards.

In an interview with the Weekend Post, Zambia One director of productions Derrick Kondowe said the behaviour exhibited by Dandy Krazy is unacceptable. Having read the comments in yesterday's paper and assuming they were true, I will agree with Kondowe.

“First and foremost, I want to appeal to the executive of Zambia Association of Musicians to discipline the boy for embarrassing the entire music association. I am wondering who really is an ignoramus here. But I will let you be the judge. I should mention however that his term, boy, does tend to carry derogatory connotations when used in the context that he did. We need to educate these artistes before they go on issuing useless comments about the local awards because they have misunderstood the essence of the awards,“ Kondowe said.What kind of education would that be ba Kondowe, if I may ask?
He said the awards are meant to recognise artistes' efforts in order to motivate them to do more in their careers.

“Coming to Born N' Bred, an initiative by Innocent Kalaluka the producer of Smooth Talk, it came about to encourage musicians to produce videos that are internationally accepted. There seems to be this insatiable desire to please the 'international.' What manner of beast is this thing called 'international' that wants to be fed at the expense of the local Zambians? Born N' Bred was made out of personal sacrifice by Kalaluka and maybe they make money out of advertisements. And for them to even offer K1m prize money it should be commended. I would appreciate if this came from seasoned artistes like Danny ‘Kaya’ Siulapwa or the Sakala Brothers because these play live music on stage, not some chaps who board a Marco Polo bus to Lusaka with a scratched disc to come and play here in Lusaka and make disparaging remarks against the local awards,” he said. Up until this point, I was thinking Kondowe was concerned about the nature of the comments and not the the status and economic condition of the person who uttered them. Should it matter what mode of transportation Krazy used to travel? It is beginning to crystallize in my mind that Kondowe may not after all be a kid from ku mayadi. 

I am beginning to suspect Kondowe is one of those kids we called "fuzi." The term, Fuzi, was used to describe a Seyfert who was always a step behind somebody but was always in the frontline protecting the image and the body of he that they envied. I love Danny and I think he cranks out some unique tunes all the time, but he does not always play live music while the Salaka bothers do. But be that as it may, not all musicians are going to have the luck of leading a band. There will always be somebody struggling on the fringes who would fit the description of a "starving musician." But it may not be by choice. Not every one was born with a silver spoon in their mouth. Some are born na mabula ya nkonde mukanwa. 

Kondowe appeal to Dandy Krazy to apologise to the organisers of the Born N' Bred and Ngoma awards.
“ZAM is of the musicians’ organisations that can hold one of the most prestigious awards in the country but for one of the artistes to come and insult the existing award(s) is an insult to all the artistes, including myself. He (Dandy) should focus on improving his poor musical and video works rather than insulting the awards,” Kondowe said.

He said currently the music videos being shown on local television channels could not match or compete at international level.

“Our brother Jordan Katembula (JK) has improved on his works, therefore Dandy should emulate him because JK can attract corporate organisations to sponsor his music because he has made us proud.  In all fairness, Kondowe should speak for himself. Some people feel JK does not not really measure up. Therefore, Dandy Krazy should not get excited over nothing when he performs in these bars and make bad comments, he only rubbishes ZAM…Let him behave like a role model because many people are looking up to him. Even the organisation that is sponsoring him cannot like to be associated with insults. What he is simply telling us is that when you drink the same sachet of ‘Krazy Berry’ he was advertising at Breakpoint, you become violent and begin to insult other people,” said Kondowe. So, Krazy has a corporate sponsor! And Kondowe knows there are people looking up to him? Kondowe is contradicting himself here.

At a performance at Breakpoint a fortnight ago, Dandy Krazy said he did not believe in the Ngoma and Born N' Bred awards because the prize monies they offered to winning artistes was insufficient and only belittled artistes.

He described the Born N' Bred Awards as useless and the Ngoma Awards rubbish.

Final Note: Let's learn to listen well, think rationally, and speak right. And most of all, let's learn to be tolerant of one another. We must not always push each other under the bus in a bid to please a foreigner. All foreigners have imyabo, no kubwekela balabwekela. Imyesu is you me and every Zambian looking out for each other. 

Politics of Poverty: "I hold this truth to be self evident"

This is one time that I could not resist the urge to read a lot into what somebody said. Judge me if you must but don't blame me. Mike's words were carefully selected and uttered repeatedly in what seemed like a rare moment of courage. 

Mike is telling us, assuming the scribe quoted him accurately, that Zambian politics is about the self and not service to the people. "...advantaging yourself," he insists. Whatever happened to the reasons we engage in politics in the first place? Has differing on the methodologies and subsequent techniques of addressing concerns of a public nature taken on a different descriptor? I thought politics was it.

professor Mike Mulongoti just gave us a new definition for the word politics - advantaging oneself - (by any means necessary?) and, in my view, is the number one reason the majority of Zambians is poor. Ours is indeed Politics of Poverty. As one of my mutola nkhani friends once said, "...if everyone who is guilty of a crime were to be locked up, the entire government would be behind bars". I thought that was a profound statement. And why aren't they?

Anyway read on:

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I'm better than Kunda - Mulongoti

By Patson Chilemba Thu 17 Feb. 2011, 04:02

Mulongoti

Mike Mulongoti says he is better than Vice-President George Kunda and has challenged him and others to a public debate to prove who the best candidate is for the MMD vice-presidency.

Reacting to Vice-President Kunda’s remarks that he was the best candidate for the MMD vice-presidency because he was one of the principal legal advisors to the government and was better placed to serve with President Rupiah Banda, Mulongoti, who is works and supply minister and MMD vice-presidential aspirant, said he had explained about his proven track record in the party, and others should do the same.

“I do hope they can give us the opportunity to debate so that the public can begin to pass judgement on us. I am not averse to debate. I am not averse to the people passing judgement on me because after all I am accessing myself to public scrutiny,” he said.

Mulongoti said Kunda should show his achievements in the MMD rather than talking about his performance in government.

“We are talking about elections. I do not think we should now bring government work into the party because the party exists as an entity. So the party also requires support. So I made a declaration and indication of what I have done in the party and I am sure everybody can see what I have done,” Mulongoti said. “If the basis is performance in government, we will all start talking about government. All I can say is I welcome him Kunda in the arena. He is my brother and I hope he can compete in a very brotherly manner.”

On Vice-President Kunda’s apparent reference to Mulongoti to stop making insinuations against other party members, Mulongoti said politics was about advantaging oneself.

He said politics was about competing at an intellectual level.

“I don’t know what type of politics they are thinking of where we have a dialogue of the dumb. Politics is not a dialogue of the dumb. Politics is about advantaging yourself. Everything you say is about advantaging yourself,” said Mulongoti. “If now everything you say becomes a crime, who is going to compete with who? Politics is not for the faint-hearted.”

Addressing the press and cadres at the Lusaka province party headquarters on Tuesday, Vice-President Kunda said he understood how the MMD operated having provided legal guidance to the party and government since he joined politics.

He said he worked well with President Banda and that relationship should not be interrupted.
Vice-President Kunda said party members should not experiment with leadership but go for tested leadership.

Adopted from The Post. February 17, 2011

Politics of Poverty? Or not.

In a responsive and responsible government, as in any efficient and effective organization, the architectural design is dictated by enormity and complexity of work to be done, and not by the number of imposa mabwe seeking position and title. Most rational thinking Zambians appreciate the fact that Zambia is a country populated by poor people, not because there are no resources to be converted to goods and services to meet their needs but victims of lack of political will to do the right thing. Their cultural value of contribution and service are overtaken by their overwhelming concern for pain in their belly. Doing the right thing, though, does not take much. All one has to do is pick out and prioritize the pressing issues, and look for people with knowledge, skills, abilities and proven experience to effectively address them.

A person vying for head of government should demonstrate to the electorate, beyond a shadow of doubt, that they have the skills of a selector of (wo)men, an absolute ingredient of a competent administrator. Subsequently, the chosen individuals need to be supervised. This means that the administrator must know what constitutes good performance, and lay it all out in no uncertain terms to those he or she hires to address the known recurrent societal issues. Additionally, a competent administrator would set up a schedule of meetings when he or she would be receiving status updates on work done toward achieving defined milestones. I call this step, receiving bundles of goods on behalf of the people. The quality of these deliverables would determine the level of competency the head of government has. To continuously enhance the quality of service, the administrator must sign compacts with his posse that clearly states that those who exceed expectations deserve a pat on the back. And those who fail to hit their marks, deserve a kick on the butt!

While kicking butt may sound like a therapeutic exercise for one's arthritic foot, avoiding it by hiring the right people for the right jobs would definitely increase the administrator's credibility. One can almost be guaranteed re-election if one did a good job of addressing, in time, the concerns of the majority, stealing notwithstanding.

This is the point, I think, old man Saunders is making in the article below. And because of his words of wisdom, I confer upon him the the title of Rational Thinker of the Week.

Zambia: Members at lower level causing pact problems – Observer

UPND supporters

Political Activist Dante Saunders has observed that the problems that have rocked the UPND/PF pact are being caused by the party members at lower organs. Mr. Saunders says from the meetings that he held with both UPND leader Hakainde Hichilema and PF’s Michael Sata, it is clear that the two opposition leaders are still interested in the Pact and that all the wrangles in the pact are being caused by the leadership at lower organs.
The veteran politician says it is evident that some members of the two parties in the Pact are scared of losing their positions in their respective parties once the Pact leader is announced hence the misunderstandings.
Mr. Saunders has told QFM news that there is need for all the leaders in the two opposition political parties to reach a compromise and ensure that whatever decision they make is for the benefit of the nation.
Mr. Saunders adds that there is need for the political leaders to prioritize the interests of the entire nation before their personal interests.
Meanwhile, Mr. Saunders has urged all the political parties to consider empowering the youths in their parties instead of using them to ignite violence during elections.
Mr. Saunders has suggested that each political party reserve at least 30 percent of their parliamentary adoptions for the younger generation.
He says this will help in grooming the youths for future political responsibilities.
[Qfm]

Adopted from Lusaka Times, Feb. 14, 2011.

What Lessons can Zambian Politicians Draw from The Events in North Africa

It is getting increasingly harder for me to restrain myself from continuing to believe that there is an unholy baptism that occurs between the campaign platform and the door to political office. Why else would people of good conscience go barefooted on a selfish path. They exhibit indisputable signs of good nature, inter alia, thoughtfulness, compassion, intentional, hardworking, purposefulness and discerning. They say the right things and those attractive characteristics cease to exist the moment they step into their new political portfolio. They quickly slide down the forget them hill. Thereafter their job description gets reduced to one sentence, "Filya bacenjele." 

After analyzing the political stench, you can't help but begin to wonder why nations organize governments at all.If all they would do is defend their ideology, in the case where they have some, or shamelessly hop from one political party to another, where they have none, the usefulness of government is brought into question. This conduct may be the reason why some people think and say politics is a dirty game.

I am not quite sure that characterization is fair. Is not politics simply a divergent of views of how to address a societal concern? in some countries, increased dependence on government to find solutions to such concerns creates an ideological rift between people giving birth to political parties. In other countries, however, divergence of views does not exist; political opponents emerge because they too want to be called "leaders."

So they lie, cheat, steal, scheme, and kill if they must, just to be called "leader" of some sort. They turn into this cunning beast which casts spellbinding smiles upon the electorate by the day and turns around and spew mind numbing pungent smelling manure by the night. In the privacy of their own minds, they are not responsible to any one but themselves. They have a chance of a lifetime; put an end to their poverty on the backs of the hardworking men and women in their countries. We don't have to get into the specifics but each one of us has questions about how people go into politics and no sooner do they open the door to their new office than they amass so much wealth. And there we are thinking politics is not supposed to be a business.

To fully appreciate why politicians find it hard to let go of their positions, go to the extent of lying, cheating, stealing, scheming, and killing when they deem it necessary we must demand full disclosure of their pays and pecks. We need to know what makes Zambian politicians so stubbornly arrogant to the point that they feel they hold title to the piece of real estate called Zambia. We must know first whether they are qualified for the job. Then we need to know how many automobiles they get from the government, how many domestic staff they are allowed to hire, where they live and how much they get in housing allowance if they live in their own houses and how much rent the government pays on their behalf if they don't have their own, how much security detail and how much does it cost the taxpayer, do they get a percentage of loan or contract they negotiate on behalf of the people of Zambia, who puts gasoline in their assigned automobiles and how often, how many cell phones they have and who pays for their talk time, how much they get per trip and who approves them, where do they take their kids for education and who foots the bill, if they have a home that they did not have before how did they acquire it and can such an acquisition be supported by their pay, what do they do to deserve such a pay anyway?

As you can see, I can go on and on about waste and lack of self respect and responsibility and responsiveness in government. Would I be wrong if I stated that our government is top-heavy and therefore unable to live up to its expectations? How may ministers and how much are we wasting on them? As if there was no shortage of jobs in the country, some of them are both cabinet ministers as well as members of parliament - which is a conflict of interest in and of itself. But nobody seems to care! They go about their fake duty like we don't matter, we are only there to generate revenue for them to they can live comfortably on our backs!

The people of Tunisia had been pushed to their last thread and had no choice but to push back. Eguptos felt they had enough of that political garbage, they pushed back. Niger just caught the fever and people there too are saying they can't take it anymore! I hope Politicians in Zambia are taking notes.

The rate of unemployment in Egupto is 40%. Zambia's is 60%! It would not take much to bring the country's economic machine to a halt. The cost of living in Zambia continues to escalate, the gap distance between the rich politicians and poor Zambians is vast. Many Zambians are hungry and by extension angry. Again, it would not take much to ignite the Zambian population into furious mob of protestors.

Many people would like to see a similar fire alight in Zambia. But I don't and I have a good reason for that. My late parents taught me that "Uwa mano  asambilila pa cipuba." I may be naive about this one, but I have a strong feeling that Zambian politicians will look at the events in north Africa and choose to stop being arrogant. They don't own Zambia. If they want to last long and continue to receive a salary for the work they have not done, they need to start listening to the concerns of the people. Here are some of the issues that they need to begin giving a serious thought:

1. Sell off ZNBC - it has been a political mouthpiece for politicians in office. Plainly it costs a lot yet it yields no benefits to the people.We can do without reading/watching the adventures of fat cats.

2. Sell off Times of Zambia -  Zambia Daily Mail and ZANIS. Like ZNBC, these institutions are being run at the expense of healthcare and education services. We need all the children to go to school.

3. Reduce the size of government - Some ministries are not necessary. We have made these recommendations over the years and politicians act as if they are the ones that make the money which fuels the government machinery. What arrogance!

4. Reduce the power of the President - That position has too much power. The president has more power than the whole government system. This has to stop. For instance, it must not be up to the president to decide when elections would be held. We need a fixed day when we will be holding elections every five years. That can't cost money to change.

5. Make housing allowance an integral part of the civil servant's pay - An employer's responsibility should end with remunerating a person consistent with their pay. Unless under special circumstances when a person works in less than normal settings, the employer is not supposed to dictate the cost of a person's abode. This practice is paternalistic and has to end.

6. Keep cabinet ministers out of parliament - they don't belong there. It is conflict of interest!

7. Reduce the number of ministers to 12. - Only 12 ministries have relevance in Zambia.

8. Rein in Fringe Benefits from ministers - stop wasting taxpayers money on people who do not add vale to the quality of life of Zambians. Impose a pay cut, one automobile for office use only, no security detail, no rent, one cell phone, limited travel and more importantly - have a semi-annually performance evaluation. 

9. Don't increase the number of MPs - what is the current crop failing to do? The question, you may want to ask is, WHY? Increasing the number of ineffective people is not the solution. And in fact when you increase the number of MPs, you will be taking resources away from services.  We need improved services and better delivery methods.

10. Fix Roads - Have you no shame?

11. Unbundle ZESCO - It is about time the inefficiency and ineffectiveness that is impeding economic growth was eliminated. Why are you forcing us to accept interrupted power supply (IPS) as normal? The government's failure to recognize the catalytic importance of electric power in Zambia defies commonsense.

12. Post government spending against budget on the internet - we want to take part in monitoring who is performing and who is not.

The intent of the above recommendation is to make politics unattractive to lethargic thinkers, keep good for nothing politicians out of government. Zambia has serious problems. She needs serious people to solve them.

Ms. Inonge Wina: A consistent Rational Thinker

The hard and fast rules of open intellectual debate demand that a participant stays focused on the topic, demonstrate clear understanding of the other party's point of view, present their areas of disagreement and subsequently explain their point of view. If it seems like a lot of work, it is because it is. For this reason alone, those who feel too weak to do the work turn to irrational thinking, the demonstration of which is demonizing the other party. Any debater who aims to prop their image at the expense of others simply because they hold a view that is at variance with theirs exhibits nothing but ignorance and immaturity of the highest order.

A rational debater will weigh his or her remarks and where they believe their brain would be a weak slave when it came to maintaining consistency in their thoughts and subsequent pronouncements, they use notes. Also, they would develop a technique to default to when they are asked a question about an issue on which they have not had to time to reflect. 

Today I pay tribute to Mama Inonge Wina for consistently keeping a cool head on contentious national issues. Each time she makes a public statement she appears to have had done her thinking. Her thoughts seem clear and words weighed. She tempers criticism with respect. It is easy for one to see that all her arguments are underpinned by objectivity. Although she may be partisan her quest for reasonableness comes through every word she makes. One cannot help but appreciate her unique political style - it does not struggle, but radiates the supremacy of thought on the Zambian political arena - unique skill of articulation of the issues and concerns of the masses. It is not personal - it is not about VP Kunda, and it is not even about P Banda. It is about work - the degree of legitimacy of the Constitution. She identifies the shortcomings of the review process and then explains why she believes so. That is the epitome of intellectual debate.

Mama Inonge, once again, I confer upon you the crown of a rational thinker.

Zambia needs more people like you.

Kunda’s constitution will be of limited legitimacy - Inonge

By George Chellah The Post  Tue 30 Nov. 2010

Inonge Wina

VICE-PRESIDENT George Kunda's proposed constitution will be a document of very limited legitimacy and without authority, says Inonge Wina.

In an interview yesterday, Wina, who is PF national chairperson, said Zambia's history had been dogged by chronic instability in constitution making.

"This is a recipe for conflict in a multiparty democracy. It creates a lot of dissatisfaction among people. People feel this is not their constitution and it’s not part of them," Wina said. "George Kunda's new proposed constitution will unfortunately be a document of very limited legitimacy and will therefore lack authority."

Wina said the amendments to the 1996 constitution announced by Vice-President Kunda fell far short of the people's expectations. She said Zambians wanted the new constitution to address substantive issues such as the Bill of Rights and other fundamental freedoms.

Wina said Zambians were also concerned about the performance of members of parliament hence their submission that non-performing parliamentarians must be recalled.

"People brought about issues of crossing the floor, that it's bringing a lot of by-elections. The issue of the 50 per cent plus one presidential requirement and indeed many fine recommendations from the Mung'omba Constitution Review Commission (CRC), which include matters of gender equality and all these have been left out," she said.

Wina wondered how long Zambia would continue being a nation that specialises in aborting constitution-making initiatives.

She said the current administration had yet again demonstrated its disdain for people's aspirations by ignoring their recommendations. Wina said the government was set to alienate Zambians from the state and its institutions.

"That's why my strong conviction is that this country needs a government that will listen and respect people's aspirations, a government capable of providing a stable solution to the challenges of constitution making," Wina said. "Above all, a government that will create a conducive environment for a much broader consensus. Otherwise, we will continue making piece-meal amendments regarding a very important law of the land and which every subsidiary law of the country depends on."

Essentials of Rational Thinking

We descend from a lineage of great thinkers who never thought education required a formal setting. In the same way that there is no formal school to teach bees how to make honey from an assortment of fluids, there was no need for a formal school in the lives of our forebears. To them experience was school; one learned the ropes through experience. One was initiated into the circle of men or women through the rites of passage. Such an admission availed to one a certain set of infundo essential for rational thinking and conduct. Therefore, more often than never, age conferred upon one, certain rights, responsibilities and expectations.

Each time one utters a word, one is responsible for its effects; intended or not. That made conversation an art. Great conversationists were known for their skillful choice and use of words.  It has been argued that in some societies, free speech is a right. But then again only a fool would play ignorant to the responsibility that comes with an uttered word. It could destroy, just as much as it could built. If what one says does not have a damaging effect on another when it was intended to, it would, at the very least, have a reverse impact on he who uttered it. It then follows that one cannot hurt another unless one contains hurt. In other words one cannot give what one lacks.

Our forebears had values. They also had principles. Their spoken words were guided by the congruence between their values and their principles. When the difference between values and principles is obliterated, one achieves inner peace.

The purpose of this piece is to help Zambians to align their values and principles. Before we draw a contrast between values and principles, it is important to state here that the benefit is simply that one becomes a rational thinker. 

You may be familiar with the cliche, "think before you speak." It actually means, tontonkanishisha, langulak, etetula, elyo no kucilisha, shikatala mukusosa. After heeding the advice of the ancient, it will quickly dawn on you that our forebears were not only masters of conversation but before that, great thinkers. This is how their minds guided their thought process:

• Purpose - Why am I speaking? What am I trying to accomplish?  What is my central aim? My purpose?
• Question - What point am I making? What question am I raising?  What question am I addressing?  Am I considering the complexities in the question?
• Information - What question am I using in coming to that conclusion? What experience have I had to support this claim? What information do I need to support this claim? What information do I need to settle the question?
• Inference/Conclusion - How did I reach this conclusion? Is there another way to interpret the information?
• Concepts - What is the main idea here?  Can I explain this idea?
• Assumptions - What am I taking for granted? What assumption has led me to that conclusion?
• Implications/Consequences - If someone accepted my position, what would be the implications? What am I implying?
• Points of view - From what point of view am I looking at this issue? Is there another point of view I should consider?

The stack difference between the lives of our forebears and ours is the great rift between our values and our principles. Very few Zambians can claim to have a specific set of principles that they use to guide their daily decisions. Most of them are constantly walking in the shadow of those that they hold in high esteem. By this I mean they don't think their own thoughts. They simply regurgitate what they heard somebody else say. The only differentiating characteristic between them and the other person is either the side of town he or she lives, the car he or she drives, the complexion of his or her skin, the level of education that their idol has attained, or simply being a foreigner.

Zambians have a tendency to cede their control of their mind to the person they hold in high esteem. However, the most important lady in my life would argue that it is not only a Zambian thing, it is everywhere. She might have a point. But I am not concerned with everywhere else. My concern is Zambians.

It is from the Zambian thinking process where words such as ukwetetula, ukutontonkanishisha, ukupelulula, ukulangulaka and ukushikatala have escaped. Faced with a situation that does not resemble the ordinary, most Zambians would default to fikaisova, finshi ndeculila, wafwa walemana, awe ifwe ni fino fine, twalibelela, nasangamo ukufilwa, nani akansunga, ngafweniko fye, etc. One of my late friends used to call that the defeatist attitude. I call it second class thinking. He could not bring himself to understand how a normal thinking person would declare themselves a cultural ignoramus when they hail from abundance of wisdom.

The purpose of this piece is to repackage the mind. Because much of the thinking people are doing, left to itself is evidently biased, distorted, partial, uninformed or downright stupid. Am I being judgmental? Perhaps. Because to refuse to stand aside and watch while Second class thinking is ferociously boring the core of the Zambian mind. Second class thinking is the root of all evil, I think. Leave the love of money out of it. And don't blame it on the devil either. Second class thinking is costly, both in monetary terms and quality of life.

The antidote to Second class thinking is Rational thinking. It can be achieved by self-direction, self discipline, self-monitoring, and self-correction. In the absence of the support system that our forebears had, rational thinking requires rigorous standards of excellence and mindful command of their use and a commitment to overcoming our internalized oppression which holds that we are inferior.  We are not. We are great people! We are the natural great thinkers. Impanda mano mu cinecine. If not you, then who?

Zambians, now more than ever before, are in need of rescuing from Second Class Thinking.

In defense of the Third Dimension

Whether educated, or not, whether traveled or not, there is one retrogressive habit by which the majority of Zambians is identified. As matter of fact in the first republic, the then president, impalume Kenneth Kaunda, got a little worked up about it and ordered a study of the volume of pombe Zambians guzzled in a year. I was not imbibing at the time, as I don't now, but it turned out to be enough to evenly cover the entire Zambian landscape by an approximate height of eight centimeters. I doubt that study accounted for lituku, kancina, amantalakwa, sikokiyana, katankamanine uko, cipumu, imbamba, katubi, imbote, ifiseke, katata, umunkoyo, seven-days, to mention but a few. Because all these brews have the potential to knock one out cold. Interestingly, the population was about 5 million. That must have been some serious quaffing people did. Impalume Kenneth Kaunda was right to be concerned. It makes one wonder by how much the volume has risen, considering that the population has more than doubled and the rate of unemployment is relatively high.

If one cared so much as to convert even a fraction of that time spent on boozing into a series of coordinated economic activities, probably some of the problems we are grappling with today could have been prevented. Imagine if all drinkers in Zambia gave up an hour of their monthly drinking time, instead of using their hands to nurse a cold one or swirl icikale of opaque brew, they would commit them to a pick and shovel and in a flood zone, the extent of the flooding problem would be a little less than we experiencing today. Admittedly the hands technology would not yield a permanent solution but more than drinking beer, it would beget us a culture of solving problems by any means necessary.

A culture of thinking rationally and solving problems by any means necessary, is a strategy resorted to by those who are dealt a bad card many a time, pushed to a tight corner and cannot take it any more. I am talking about having the ingenuity and courage to put our resources to great use. Most Zambians lack the drive to do just that, be they educated or not, traveled or not. But then again, there is a special breed of Zambians who will not take it, regardless of their education, or international exposure. To them foolish pride is a refuge for irrational thinkers. Instead they pursue their goals with the precision of a brain surgeon, the focus of a smart-bomb, the speed of a heat-seeking missile and the courage of a wounded buffalo. A little information is all they need to get started. These people are like a needle in the haystack, they don't come by but once in a lifetime. Let's call them the turn tabs.

Their counterparts, the third dimension, on the other hand, are a dime a dozen. They want to feed well, sound sophisticated and more importantly dress well. I once met this young lady in my lawyer's office who had a mirror on her desk strategically positioned to give her feedback on her appearance at a glance. The frequency at which she consulted that mirror, I would swear, stroke me as someone who doubted the honesty of the instrument. If by chance the mirror convinced her to ask me for second opinion, I would have sided with the mirror. The reflection she saw in the mirror was a true image of her and no one else. Now, had she put all that consulting time and effort; checking and double checking, into reading a book to improve her inner-self, to improve the perception of herself, boost her confidence, and develop a positive mental attitude, she probably would have gained much more.

But reading, committing her mind to rigorous introspection, developing her governing values, sculpting her philosophies and refining her principles was not in her culture. She was not even a conversationist because had she even an inkling of what that is, she could have engaged me, the rough looking visitor, in some intellectual discourse. What the mirror image was not able to tell her, "more than you are, but less than you want to be," I would have told her. But engaging in conversations that are exploratory in nature, informative and perhaps enlightening was not one of her cultural practices. It used to be but it died when somebody subliminally convinced her that there was something wrong with her natural hair, her flat nose, her complexion, etc. She might have been thinking by constantly checking herself up in the mirror, she would experience the Pygmalion effect. That unrated thought, though, did not stop me from wondering, like I do each time I walk the streets of Zambia, about who would suggest those practices for her and many other youths like her. Because, sometimes that's all it takes - a suggestion.

A suggestion, not a threat, in an opportune moment can set off a domino effect ultimately turning a person's life for the better. The recipient of that input, if they appreciated it, would quit doing things that are ruinous to themselves. When they are given the right input and feedback, they have reason to begin seeing themselves in a much more positive light. They begin to resist the temptation to permit their imagination to slide into overdrive when simple words such as abroad, overseas, ubulaya, amangalande, kufyalo, are spoken. They would begin to differentiate truth from hype. That is what most of the stories they hear about ubulaya are - untainted hype.

When some of those living ku fyalo visit/return home, they take with them bunk. Lies-filled stories of how large they live. They would have prepared a thing or two to impress their admirers; it may be a t-shirt with some funny print, a pair of funny tailored jeans, icisapato or some foul smelling scent. To their admirers, it's all good because it came from ku mangalande. What a croak of nonsense!

That initial change in the quality of input provides an incentive for them to become turn tabs.
Mwe bakufyalo, be truthful, twapapata. Tell the truth. Help your friends and family understand the truth. Cishinka, ku mangalande, like anywhere else, there are no money trees and everyone who has any works hard for it. Stop lying ati "I get isaka na half per mulungu." Wenye! "And ...er...and I have set aside enough money to buy mazembe. Manje apa so nifuna kumanga nyumba double decker." Mwebaume mwe! Nyumba inkale double decker? What would Paul Ngozi say?


Very few Zambians who end up in foreign lands actually make something of themselves. Most of them spend time drinking Heineken, checking every hood they can find, and discussing politics, just like they did in shebeens before they crossed the pond. They would pause behind stretched limos and send pictures back home and lie. "This is how I roll," they would say, pointing at the gargantuan of a car. Really? And when their daring cousin fleeces them for change while they are nursing a cold one or swirling icikale ca opaque brew in the name of, "I miss this stuff, you know," don't blame him. Batila "mumbwe aitile mpashi, impashi nasho shaisa, elyo shamububa!"

The trouble that some Zambians living in foreign lands face, malibu yakuilombela for the most part. When they have been lying about theirs and their friends' economic status all along, when time comes to substantiating their claims, they perpetuate the lie by extending the web of lies - lie again to cover the lies told earlier. And some unsuspecting bystander begins to create castles in the sky about their sibling who got a scholarship to China. What you are forgetting is that your lies are like a pile of poop. If you dump and run, remember that when you return, it will stink just as bad.

It is an uphill battle to debunk some of these myths when they have been safely deposited in the corner of the subconscious mind of a third dimension operating under the influence. A sincere person, a transplanted turn tab, seeking to create a means of earning an income from a critical set of assets becomes the victim of this indistinguishable long drawn senseless hype. This may be a case of umusuku ubi utushe mpanga, I think. And it has to stop.

Let's help ourselves and our people, let's share the truth,  the pure, the powerful, and the positive. Te cikale ca opaque beer nangula a cold one. Evidently, that has taken us nowhere. But if we freed enough of our people from the shackles of the third dimension to turn tab, there is no doubt in my mind that we will get where we want to be in good time.

We can move up and forward together mu cishinka.